You Never Really Stop Learning

Before I forget (or lose my journal), I wanted to take a moment and write out all the various things God has taught me these last few months, along with Scriptures that correlate to some of the lessons. Several of these came out of some very sweet quiet times, while others same during my morning prayer time during my commute to work. Some of the lessons came with much soul-searching and contemplation, while others are just flat-out basic things that I had to be reminded of because I was going through some stuff at the time. They have both challenged and encouraged me, and I am grateful to worship a God who teaches as well as loves.

1) I have to stop wanting to be like others! When I say that, I mean I want to stop trying to model how I love God, worship God and serve God based on how other people do those things. I need to stop because I only need to model my life after Christ. God has put so many faithful and sold-out people in my life, but I think their purpose is to point me more towards Christ through encouragement, prayer and love, not for me to obsessively compare myself to them. I always feel like I'm falling short, but it's because I'm always trying to find fault with how God made me. I know no two people can ever be at the same place spiritually, emotionally, and mentally, so why do I spend time mentally redoing what God has already established in me? Who am I to do that?? At the heart of it, when I am wasting time looking at other people's lives for the purpose of comparing or finding fault, then it means I am not focused on God and not looking at the example His precious Son set for me.

2 Corinthians 10:12
We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.

2) I need to be in constant prayer about my job and work environment. God has placed me there for a reason, and I spend 8 hours surrounded by a whole host of influences, behaviors and attitudes. Am I going to be influenced, or will I influence others for Christ? Also, my attitude about my job needs to change, with an emphasis on rejoicing in the fact that I have a great job with really good coworkers, instead of being unproductive and lazy and pessimistic.

Psalm 90:17
May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us;
establish the work of our hands for us—
yes, establish the work of our hands.

3) Right now I am in my first year of BSF and we are studying the life of Moses. During a lesson a few months ago, we learned about Moses taking advice from his father-in-law Jethro. During the lecture that evening, I was hit with a conviction lightning bolt about how I need to not take any of them for granted, and rejoice for the relationships I have with each one. Not every one has healthy, open relationships with their in-laws, and I am so blessed to be able to spend time with each one without the dread or anxiety others may feel at the thought of spending time with their in-laws. I love each one dearly, and I am grateful to have such loving and considerate in-laws.

Exodus 18: 7-8
So Moses went out to meet his father-in-law and bowed down and kissed him. They greeted each other and then went into the tent. Moses told his father-in-law about everything the LORD had done to Pharaoh and the Egyptians for Israel's sake and about all the hardships they had met along the way and how the LORD had saved them.

4) This one was a doozy for me. I don't know if I have mentioned it before on the blog, but my husband and I have been praying and trying to have children for a while now. Through this time, God has been incredibly and abundantly faithful in keeping me focused on Him and not turning into a fretful, ovulation-obssessed bundle of raw nerves and hysteria. However, during this same time, I too often allow myself to entertain thoughts about how long I am willing to wait for God, and what our other "options" might be. How long is too long to wait on Him? During some quiet time reflection, He spoke very gently to my heart and asked if I was waiting on Him, or if I was waiting on His will and timing only in regards to children. Why aren't I just waiting on Him and seeking His will for my life without conditions or expectations? I cannot make my obedience to him dependent on what He may or may not do for me. I must focus on waiting on and serving Him for who He is, and not for what He can do for me. If I am always waiting on Him for something, then I am setting myself up for certain disappoinment.

Psalm 27:14
Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

Psalm 130:5
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
and in his word I put my hope.

Psalm 25:5
guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are God my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long

5) God and I spent some time alone this evening, and at the end of my prayer time, He put this on my heart: He has already spoken directly to us through His word, the Bible. It gives comfort, guidance, peace, truth and so much more, but am I listening to it? I have been told by honest and loving people that I need to work on my listening skills. I tend to be the type that half-listens while thinking of things to say in response. With the Bible, it's no different. Often I pray earnestly to know God better, and to have more of Scripture impressed into my heart. But when it comes to the Bible, too often I half-read while thinking of other things. I live in a country with the greatest access to the Scripture, among the whole span of history, and yet I still don't really delve into it as I should. I don't seek it as a precious jewel, or treat it like the treasure it is. I have access to the living Word of God, spoken and written for you and me, and yet I don't tear into it half as fast as I tear open my latest Entertainment Weekly or other magazines. Blech! Woe is me, not just for my unclean lips, but for my unclean eyes, desiring so many things before I desire time with the precious Word of God!

Good night.